If things continue to turn around, I will someday look back on March of 2009, and be proud of myself. For the first time in a long time, instead of putting my head down trying to push through all the adversity, I stopped pushing and something amazing happened. I realized that the wall I had been beating my head against had an open door two steps to the left and I couldn't see it because I was being so narrow minded in my focus and approach.
I know that it's not going to be all upswings and life robusto from now on, but I've got the strength, confidence and roadmap to get me through the tough times in the future.
I'm going to get back into more consistent writing in April. Part of stepping back, was not worrying about keeping up the blog amongst other things, but the next three months are going to be fast paced and exciting in the Burro household as we get ready to move to Austin...........Finally.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Monday, March 2, 2009
Post #15 - Recovery
That is my goal for March...........REBUILD & RECOVER.
Things have been so sh!tty recently, that writing about them isn't even cathartic. If something can go wrong recently, it has. I'm really trying hard to keep a positive outlook on everything, but it's just getting harder and harder each day that I have drag myself to the job I hate. I really think all the other things would seem so much less troubling if I wasn't miserable for 10-12 hours a day, 5 days a week. So, I'm starting to formulate my "exit strategy". Luckily, my beautiful and intelligent wife may be starting her dream job in Austin this summer, which means finally getting out of Htown, and possibly having a bit more financial freedom to take a pay cut and do something I love (fingers crossed).
My workouts have come to a stand still due to my recent bout with teh shingles, but I'll be getting back to regular 6 day/week sessions now that I'm close to 100%.
Last, but certainly not least, poker. L.O. f'n L. Play bad, run bad. Play good, run bad. I've tried it all recently. Super NIT, TAG, LAG, you name it, I've tried it, and I can't seem to find a style that works for me. My coach seems confident that I am just going through a rough patch, and that I should be able to beat these limits easily, but my confidence is shot. I pretty much put the coaching on hold to go back and start from scratch watching as many of the uNL and ssNL vids as I can, and...........drop down to NL50.
Things have been so sh!tty recently, that writing about them isn't even cathartic. If something can go wrong recently, it has. I'm really trying hard to keep a positive outlook on everything, but it's just getting harder and harder each day that I have drag myself to the job I hate. I really think all the other things would seem so much less troubling if I wasn't miserable for 10-12 hours a day, 5 days a week. So, I'm starting to formulate my "exit strategy". Luckily, my beautiful and intelligent wife may be starting her dream job in Austin this summer, which means finally getting out of Htown, and possibly having a bit more financial freedom to take a pay cut and do something I love (fingers crossed).
My workouts have come to a stand still due to my recent bout with teh shingles, but I'll be getting back to regular 6 day/week sessions now that I'm close to 100%.
Last, but certainly not least, poker. L.O. f'n L. Play bad, run bad. Play good, run bad. I've tried it all recently. Super NIT, TAG, LAG, you name it, I've tried it, and I can't seem to find a style that works for me. My coach seems confident that I am just going through a rough patch, and that I should be able to beat these limits easily, but my confidence is shot. I pretty much put the coaching on hold to go back and start from scratch watching as many of the uNL and ssNL vids as I can, and...........drop down to NL50.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Monday, February 16, 2009
Post #13 - I'm not dead or busto.........
......but I feel damn close.
The bottom has pretty much dropped out for me recently. I can't seem to put in a winning session to save my life. I'm basically in the middle of a 30 Buy In downswing, and getting ready to suck it up and drop down to NL50 for a while. I started getting some mentoring from a DC coach and FTP NL200'er "jongreenway". He basically crushes the NL200 games on FTP playing a very solid and heady game. I'm hoping he can help me with some of the many leaks that I obviously have and get me going in the right direction again, because right now, I really don't remember what it feels like to win.
I would love for that to be the worst part of my life right now, but unfortunately, it's not. My wife and I are still struggling to cope with the loss of our unborn child. I've never felt more devastated as I did when I heard, "there's no more heartbeat". I still don't believe it, and the whole pregnancy prior to that seems like a dream.
Oh yeah, I hate my job. (who doesn't?)
FML.
The bottom has pretty much dropped out for me recently. I can't seem to put in a winning session to save my life. I'm basically in the middle of a 30 Buy In downswing, and getting ready to suck it up and drop down to NL50 for a while. I started getting some mentoring from a DC coach and FTP NL200'er "jongreenway". He basically crushes the NL200 games on FTP playing a very solid and heady game. I'm hoping he can help me with some of the many leaks that I obviously have and get me going in the right direction again, because right now, I really don't remember what it feels like to win.
I would love for that to be the worst part of my life right now, but unfortunately, it's not. My wife and I are still struggling to cope with the loss of our unborn child. I've never felt more devastated as I did when I heard, "there's no more heartbeat". I still don't believe it, and the whole pregnancy prior to that seems like a dream.
Oh yeah, I hate my job. (who doesn't?)
FML.
Monday, January 26, 2009
Post #12 - Swonguary 2009
This is how I will remember January unless I can get a nice heater to finish the month. My graph looks like some obnoxious roller coaster that makes you vomit, so I'll probably refrain from causing any motion sickness in the one or two readers of this blog. I've been +2000, -800, +800, -800, and I'm sitting at a pitiful +70 right now (better than -70 in a "half full" world I guess). Everytime I put together a couple days of good play, I seem to follow that up with a disastrous day that eats up almost all of my profit from the previous days. The worst part is I've been doing a bunch of studying over that time period, so I don't know if I am applying things incorrectly, at the wrong times, or just not understanding the concepts. Thank you DC for making me feel completely clueless right now ;)
I'm enlisting the help of an established winner at SS&MSNL 6max, and I hope it can develop into a great poker relationship. I could definitely use the help right now, so it's good to know that I have someone to get me through the rough spots and help me get my bankroll and game ready to move up in stakes. There's no guarantee this will happen, but my "mentor" seems confident, so we shall see.
I'm enlisting the help of an established winner at SS&MSNL 6max, and I hope it can develop into a great poker relationship. I could definitely use the help right now, so it's good to know that I have someone to get me through the rough spots and help me get my bankroll and game ready to move up in stakes. There's no guarantee this will happen, but my "mentor" seems confident, so we shall see.
Monday, January 19, 2009
Post #11 - Back to NL100, Back in the right direction
I'm still kind of reeling from my brief jump to NL200. It's hard watching 1/3 of your bankroll go flying out the window when you got in with the best of it 90% of the time. That being said, I'm happy with myself for not chasing my losses and getting into a bigger hole. Instead, I sucked it up and put in 5k hands of NL100 on Saturday and Sunday to get myself back on stable ground and start moving in the right direction again. I won a little over 6 BI's, and I'm again on the positive side for the month.
I finally took the time to get my HUD setup and running, and it's tough following the stats on 6 tables at a time. I had to make a cheat sheet to remind me of what each number represented (embarrassed). I'm sure that once I get used to it and build a bigger database on the players that it will be extremely helpful, but right now, it's almost more of a hindrance than helpful.
The installs that helped more than anything this weekend were some FTP mods from Tiltbusters. I downloaded one of their table mods, and found some cards and Paulson Pharoahs chips as well. The new setup looks great and makes it much easier to multitable!
I highly recommend checking out Tiltbusters even if you are just bored with your current setup, as they have mods for most sites inlcuding FTP, Stars, UB, etc.
I wasn't originally planning on depositing into my FTP account (originally funded with transfer), but with my recent downswongy attempt at NL200, I decided to dump $600 in so I could take advantage of the signup bonus. It's a free $600 right? I cleared $120 of it this weekend, and I hope to have it all cleared in the next week or so.
I did get a nice $200 in rakeback last week because of my shot at NL200. Would have been great if I didn't drop $1200 during the process. At some point, I hope to start withdrawing my rakeback every month, but for now, it's staying in and helping build my roll. I'll likely be staying at NL100 for a while. It was worth the shot when I felt like I could do no wrong, but now that reality and variance have set in, I'll just stay where I'm at until I feel HEAVILY rolled to move up in stakes. For me, that probably means somewhere in the neighborhood of 50 BI's. I'd rather be a bankroll nit and play more aggressively on the tables, than be a nit at the tables and play in too big of a game where I'm scared money or less confident.
I'm still going strong at 45min/day, 6days/week on level 4, and I think it's time to bump up the time or level next month. I'm thinking going to level 5 is the answer. At the end of 45 minutes, I'm still feeling REALLY strong. I still want to find time to add some yoga workouts during the week, but I haven't come up with a plan I feel good about. I need to get on that though, my back and shoulders have been really sore lately, so I need to incorporate some serious stretching to my routine.
One last thing regarding my back, shoulder and neck issues........I'm considering getting an ergonomic chair for poker. I've been told it's a MUST for grinding long hours, so after a bunch of research and shopping, I think I've settled on the Raynor Ergohuman. There's an Austin store that sells on Ebay and they have a great deal with 30% off through Microsoft Live making the cost only about $400 instead of $650+. Part of me thinks it's crazy to spend $400 on a chair, but I've heard countless testimonials about the benefits of an ergonomic chair, so I'm most likely taking the plunge.
Hasta Luego!
I finally took the time to get my HUD setup and running, and it's tough following the stats on 6 tables at a time. I had to make a cheat sheet to remind me of what each number represented (embarrassed). I'm sure that once I get used to it and build a bigger database on the players that it will be extremely helpful, but right now, it's almost more of a hindrance than helpful.
The installs that helped more than anything this weekend were some FTP mods from Tiltbusters. I downloaded one of their table mods, and found some cards and Paulson Pharoahs chips as well. The new setup looks great and makes it much easier to multitable!
I highly recommend checking out Tiltbusters even if you are just bored with your current setup, as they have mods for most sites inlcuding FTP, Stars, UB, etc.
I wasn't originally planning on depositing into my FTP account (originally funded with transfer), but with my recent downswongy attempt at NL200, I decided to dump $600 in so I could take advantage of the signup bonus. It's a free $600 right? I cleared $120 of it this weekend, and I hope to have it all cleared in the next week or so.
I did get a nice $200 in rakeback last week because of my shot at NL200. Would have been great if I didn't drop $1200 during the process. At some point, I hope to start withdrawing my rakeback every month, but for now, it's staying in and helping build my roll. I'll likely be staying at NL100 for a while. It was worth the shot when I felt like I could do no wrong, but now that reality and variance have set in, I'll just stay where I'm at until I feel HEAVILY rolled to move up in stakes. For me, that probably means somewhere in the neighborhood of 50 BI's. I'd rather be a bankroll nit and play more aggressively on the tables, than be a nit at the tables and play in too big of a game where I'm scared money or less confident.
I'm still going strong at 45min/day, 6days/week on level 4, and I think it's time to bump up the time or level next month. I'm thinking going to level 5 is the answer. At the end of 45 minutes, I'm still feeling REALLY strong. I still want to find time to add some yoga workouts during the week, but I haven't come up with a plan I feel good about. I need to get on that though, my back and shoulders have been really sore lately, so I need to incorporate some serious stretching to my routine.
One last thing regarding my back, shoulder and neck issues........I'm considering getting an ergonomic chair for poker. I've been told it's a MUST for grinding long hours, so after a bunch of research and shopping, I think I've settled on the Raynor Ergohuman. There's an Austin store that sells on Ebay and they have a great deal with 30% off through Microsoft Live making the cost only about $400 instead of $650+. Part of me thinks it's crazy to spend $400 on a chair, but I've heard countless testimonials about the benefits of an ergonomic chair, so I'm most likely taking the plunge.
Hasta Luego!
Friday, January 16, 2009
Post #10 - WTF?!?! (doomswitched ldo)
I'm sure this is all pretty "standard", but it's been a painful last few days none the less. 10,000 hands of NL200, -$1200.
I might post some hands in a bit, but they make me sick to look at.
Back to NL100.
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